Nathaniel,

Writing to you is perhaps the hardest. You are the youngest and so trying to tell you how much I miss you and regret having to let you go seems strange given the passage of time.

When your mother and I separated you were very young, practically still a baby. Things had been bad for a long time and we should have done more to protect you and your siblings from the fall-out of our relationship ending. Certainly, if there is one thing that your mother and I could agree upon, it is that we both wish that the three of you could have been better protected from the emotional turmoil.

I hold dear so many wonderful memories of you; taking you to Spain with your sister, you were adorable learning Spanish words! Playing in the garden, taking you to the park, listening to you just beginning to learn to read.

I know I have missed out on so much of your early life, it feels so selfless sending you this letter. Nevertheless, I need you to understand that whilst I know my choice will have been painful to you, as it was I, I made it hoping it would help you find peace and enable you to live with some degree of normality.

I hope you did find that peace and that one day you would wish to rekindle a relationship with me, at such time, you would be so very welcomed here.

I love you, always, and miss you with each and every day that passes.

All of my love, always, Daddy xxx